tuesdays with Morrie.

Before I delve into the real purpose of this entry I would like to share with you some of my insights on why my entries seem to strike of chord with some of you. You can never know the real meaning of what my entries say (particularly poetry),unless you ask me directly. It's really a pain to get these side step responses. If you have an ounce of humility within you, approach me. I am not ravenous nor condescending. I simply find my blogger is a place of my personal expression, just like you do.

I love each of you dearly, and quite frankly my spirituality is growing. I wish that we were closer than we are at times, but I know that each of you has certain needs for closeness as do I. Regardless, I love sharing with you more than anything. We don't exist in this world alone, and my entries I feel should benefit more than just myself now. Let's not take things so personal.

Onward---


I'm pouring over a book for my literature, morals and ethics course called tuesdays with Morrie. I generally loathe the reading material for school, as the last book was about viral plagues around the world, this one reaches much closer to the heart. I just started reading at about 10:30 and have almost finished 100 pages. I think I will finish it by the end of tonight.
If you ever feel like a deep read that questions what you know about life ask me for this book, or go to the library. It's that profound.

http://www.randomhouse.com/features/morrie/

Brief synopsis:
Mitch Albom, a middle aged wealthy sports reporter looks back on his life's ambitions of youth and realizes he completely leaves them behind for a material world of bigger paychecks with smaller morals and self worth. In Mitch's college years he has a professor (Morrie) whom he becomes extremely close to, but falls out of touch with. Fortunately, after rediscovering his professor through a national news interview, Mitch is able to rekindle with Morrie who imparts in a matter of weeks many of life's lessons.

The quote I want to share with you is, " If you accept that you can die at any time, you might not be as ambitious as you are."-Morrie

I have a more friendly read posted on my facebook, but honestly, this quote meant even more to me. If you know you will die today, would you be so focused on the material things that you are now? If the answer is no, I think we should all do a little soul searching.

Strength. Wisdom. Deep thinking. Meditation.

Much of my close circle changes now.
I feel the earth quaking beneath my feet.
A silent invisible line creates division between us.
You remain distant, cold, unfeeling.
My eyes dart away from our memories.
As my circle changes, my higher mind reconfigures.
Reject the old, gilded poison. Profess your truth.
Your internal resonance. Your spirit gives off vibrations.
We are not simply material beings.
Skin, flesh, nerves, skeleton, muscle, lymphatic creations.
Our gift lies in our ability to be civil. Our five digited fingers.
We build, and we break down.
Which path will you take?
I know it sounds crazy, but to me the answer is simple.
It's not always about what we feel like doing.
It is about what we know is right.
Don't get lost in the words you hear, and the beauty you see.
As they say, beauty is merely skin deep.
Lies. Treachery. Malice. Depression. Tourniquet. Death.
I am not afraid of you.
Reverse your anguish. Quit being so self righteous.
It is not very becoming, and quite frankly,
I cannot stand beside you smelling the rotting of your skin.
The sinking of your consciousness.
Pray for discernment. Seek refuge.
Be strong, and of good courage.
Quit sulking in your "misery".

The Wild Thornberrys.

I got so excited just watching this. Hope someone else can too.

Reorientation.

My blogger account won't open elsewhere. So when I move from this desktop, no more inner workings, at least not here.

Every step I take I leave you further behind. I scramble around, attempting to regain my balance.
You are no longer by my side. I cry from time to time. And I know that's all right.
Everything changes for me. My life is about progression. And spiritual is on the top of my list.
All things and entities superficial always EVENTUALLY become mere memories.
Why am I not interested in anything they say and do?
I feel like it's punishment, but it feels so good to know where I stand.
Unfortunately, that often leaves me on my own.
Are we too defiant for our own good?
No. Jah knows me better than I know myself.
Realistically, with growth and change somethings may drastically become different.
C'est la vie.

Don't think I'll ever forget you.
Because I won't. I love you more than I can show you.
I'm a distant lover. Watchful eyes. Invisible kisses
adorn your cheek and forehead. You deserve to be with
people more approving than I. I am not cynical, only
seeking another path. Some days I dream of you, while
lying in the grass. I know you must go your own way.
Let's just not pretend. I'm not a pretender. Justification
is the base of all my actions. Purpose in every step.
Originality is what I seek. When will we reach the
pinnacle of our missions in this life?
When we stop being afraid to be what we know we are,
and go the way we know is within us.
Fear is only skin deep to me.
Callused. Hardened. Defined. Beaten. Molded.
Solidifying clay. Dirt. Minerals form this being.
As I close my eyes, I watch you all disappear,
One by one.

Cathole Method. Leave No Trace. Jungle child.

http://www.lnt.org/programs/principles_3.php

Thought of the day. :]

Seek altruism.

Just ran finally. It's pretty amusing to see Baltimoreans in their cars baffled to see a pretty brown girl in work out clothes at 7, running into dusk. When I run I feel alive. My legs could go on for miles. If I just stay focused the options are endless.
I've been thinking about where I'm headed, and I realize it's like driving at night in pitch black with only your high beams to lead the way. Follow the road signs and your intuition you'll get there.
I have to make lists to get things accomplished.
I have to pray. I have to work and eat yummy things. I have to travel.
I have to jump at the chance to make things better.
I have to have fun.
But only if I'm focused do any of these things feel worth
the time. :) I have to not take things so personal.
We all have our own agenda.

Sometimes a small part of me misses being close to someone.
But 80 percent of the time I am in absolute bliss. No one in
my grill. And most of the time that closeness pales in comparison
to the kind I aspire to have. Who knows.
I've been around the block and back again.
The grass only appears greener. It is actually
only miracle grow. Where I stand organically is just fine with me.

Random when I was searching for a picture found this:
How YOU Can Become a Runner
Mentally

1. Decide that you want to try jogging. Don’t over think it. You can always go back to walking tomorrow if you don’t like it.

2. Focus on the reasons why you want to become a runner or jogger. Some good reasons: improve your cholesterol, improve your body shape, lose weight, feel better, gain more energy for daily life, etc. Whatever your motivations are, write them down and post them where you will see them every day. This will be very helpful on the days that you don’t feel like running.

3. Fail-Proof it. Create a time in your schedule when you’ll be sure to have the ability to do this. For me it means mornings. If I wait until later in the day, then my energy is lower not to mention all the other activities competing for my attention.
http://zenhabits.net/2007/05/beginners-guide-to-running/
http://www.runnersworld.com/
http://www.holistic.com/holistic/Learning.nsf/b00588db461b551d87256906005eb56f/8abc7ce8b4262ea4872569f300680f3d!OpenDocument

The internet really does have everything! :D <3

Rant, rave, ramble -- decode.

I'm a storyteller and beneath these riddles there
are always messages and stories. Into the universe they flutter.

Aging proceeds wisdom.
I am exiting the golden age. Into the primodial ooze
I hop. My esoteric tendencies begin to show along with
the fire behind my eyes.
You can't define me. Does that make you tick?
I hold myself together with needle and thread.
Please be honest with me.
I'll figure you out anyway.
And the more my feelings change, the farther you drift.
Floating in an ocean of ideas, memories, I plant my seed in your mind.
It grows with each passing moment.
You are beginning to sweat.
Trickle. Trickle. Plop.
Out pours your vulnerability.

We are erroneous individuals, longing for perfection.
Idolizing the faces beyond the glass screen.
Steroid. Male enhancements. Protein shakes.
Infommericials. Miracle Grow. Silicone tits.
Prepackaged goods are never as good as the homemade
I made for you in the lazy daze of the afternoon.
The way your footsteps graze over the earth beneath
you tell me all about your life.
A journey--a seeker--a jack of all trades.
A master of?
Indeed it's easier to intellectualize a situation
rather than apply knowledge and experience life.
Give in, you know you need to.
Break your logic and redefine what logic you
possess.
The more I write the more I understand
my imperfections. Somethings were never meant to be
said. Only felt, in this realm of perception.
Forget your school lesson.
Pray. Eat. Feel. Think. Reflect. Actualize. Act.
Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

Prayer.
It's something that can only be pulled from a genuine heart.
When He and I commune there is nothing that compares.
I lower my head with humility. I imagine.
I feel peace within and around my core.
True bliss. But many of us feel empty.
We are all searching. We are all lost until we
know our insides. The best way to reach self actualization
is to know that you are not your own creator.
You cannot govern your world. You can only take
small steps to change it. I am. We don't know
our limitations these days and we think we can play God.
Well, so far that hasn't worked.
It's so easy to feign ignorance when you know
the truth persecutes everything we have been taught to
accept. Please open your mind. Everything we know
is founded on deceit. Falsehood. Stop feeding your physical
like it is your spirit. They are and never will be the same.